Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
i wrote her a fucking poem. i better get laid for that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I finally won that bet on when the anorexic girl would pass out at the gym. You owe me 10 now
Shotgunned a beer while taking a bath.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
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