in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
My doctor just informed me that my food allergies qualify me for a medical marijuana license. I get it on Tuesday. It won't help at all, but my life is awesome!
so its thursday, which means its time to resume communication with you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
I have a new favorite bar game. It's called, get dressed up and go drinking alone then make up random stories of why you are alone to look less like an alc
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
I had to rename my dildo. I met a little kid who named his teddy bear the same name. It just felt wrong.
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
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