You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
he refused to get me toilet paper before we started drinking so I keep wiping with his towel.
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
Just been one of those weeks where alcohol out weighs friendship
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
And he probably thinks I'm in love with him but after three shots of Patron you love anything
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
I looked the guy across the room straight in the eyes and said, "If you were any closer to me, we'd be making out right now."
don't mind me. just hanging out in this cool air conditioned Babies R Us until the liquor store next door opens.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
