I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
the pub in dfw airport has a countdown timer to st. pattys day, to the second, i like texas
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
I have to drop off my inflatable penis costume at the bar for my bartender. Do you think you could meet me there at like 630?
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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