my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
He talks to me in this sweet I know you might be pregnant voice.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
By the way. I expect to test the theory of you running a mile drunk for memorial day.
Stoned in a petco on a Saturday. I figured out that ferrets can eat themselves out. Just picture it. Never leaving.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Just saw Little Red Riding Hood riding a guy on hood of a car
Good for her for committing to the costume
Randomize
