i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
21 Ladies Confess The Grossest Things They Do When No One’s Around
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
Family bonfire. I just discovered my cousin drank an entire bottle of champagne at the age of 7. I just got showed up.
This year I'm going to try NOT getting arrested. I think the 30th birthday is the cutoff for calling Mom to bail me out.
How do I explain the handcuffs and tanning goggles on our living room floor? There's rope too. The cats love the rope.
Paying for my weed with Mike's hard lemonade freezables. The perks of having a gay dealer
23 Tweets I Thought Were Really Funny When I Was Drunk Yesterday
I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
i wish he'd fuck me as good as he is at karate.