I'm lost and stupid without you.
just spent all of my last class as a college student, vomiting in the bathroom. its moments like these i will cherish
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
He spent 6 hours at the ER after crashing a motorcycle and still came to the bar, Ofcourse I went home with him. He's my hero.
If you're wondering where your left shoe is you lost it in a bet with a homeless guy last night
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Sometimes I feel like I should become a beautician purely for my ability to shave pretty shapes into my pubic hair.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lmfao. We asked what you wanted to eat and you said vagina. I don't care what kind. Fresh, barbecue, roasted on a camp fire. I just want it on my taste buds.
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
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