Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
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That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
Home safe. Psyche shattered. Still rolling. In love with the morrocan rug in the living room.
I should have known I was in trouble when you started pouring shots all over me
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HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.