my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
ps i may or may not be wearing a sequined bra
Yep, it's a dick on our front door. Intentional?
he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep