the ***** family is living proof that there are no more lifeguards in the humen gene pool
Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
I just found a porn show called cleavagefield. no i am not watching.
Gave out candy dressed as a porn star...bet you can guess how the mothers kept reacting.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
Wife passed out. Doing shots with the hot bartender... Don't tell me I don't know how to celebrate a 1yr anniversary
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
Bake him heart shaped cookies?!? Send him a picture of your tits like an ADULT!
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.