You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Joe is yelling at the trees again.
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
Randomize
