Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
HEAR YE, HEAR YE! BY ROYAL DECREE, I WILL BE KNOCKING ON YOUR DOOR AT 2PM UNLESS YOU GET THE FUCK UP. IT'S 1:50. CIGARETTE TIME, BITCH. I LOVE YOU.
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
I am all the way hung over and want nothing more in this world than a McMuffin. Happy day after Thanksgiving.
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
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