Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
My face feels like its stuck between a ball sack and an asshole.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
Really because I got kicked out the eagles game for running up n down the steps singing ' fly eagles fly ' then punched a Dallas fan in the face before the game even started..
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
If walking through the neighborhood with a bottle of tequila and margarita mix is postgrad life, I'm okay with it
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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