FYI..good luck when you get back from work.. mom and dad know about the boy you brought home last night
haha good one..how did you even know?
we all know. he obviously didn't leave when you might have told him to.. he came down when we were eating because he coud smell mom's cooking. the dude ate with us and offered to say grace. so yeah, good luck.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
So is that the only criterion for shenanigans now? Don't die?
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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