like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
Was I at least a good cuddler? Like at least honorable mention?
I do not mind being torn from the first touches of sleep to see a man who looks like that
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
Christ, I'm so hungover I pretty positive I sent Luna to school with salsa instead of jelly on her sandwich.
Randomize
