There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
speaking of unleashing monsters, we need to get condoms
its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
I have to stay away from bourbon. Despite what it keeps telling me, it is NOT my friend.
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