took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
my sister and i are watching a movie and pregaming together. and by pregaming i mean shes not drinking since she 14 and im drinking alone.
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
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it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
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If you keep giving me that glorious dick ill bake you some cookies
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
Love waking up to a new contact named “Pizza” btw
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
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