You really coming over, don't trick.
All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
Chicks before dicks must only mean American dicks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
Don't trim your pubes if you've been drinking. I can't believe I have to tell you more than once.
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
You’re a genius! I just walked in, shut the door, blew him and left. He could barely move afterwards and was a hot mess at the presentation. He already sent me a calendar invite for another meeting
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