fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
my goal in life is to wake up with my underwear on
Ill pay your DUI fine if you just come see me nooooowwwww
no. its 2:30am and im not going to jail for a booty call
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
He ran five blocks just to watch me and my best friend make out. I think he's a keeper.
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
I looked up while we were having sex to see him covering my pillow pet's eyes with his free hand. I think I'm in love
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
Last night was just a whirlwind of Mario Brothers and sex.
My Hitachi broke 1 day into this stay home bullshit.
Randomize
