im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
Remind me never to take that much Vicodin ever again. I laid in bed measuring my heart rate for an hour and a half because I was afraid it would stop.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
She woke up, mumbled "the trees" When i asked her what about them, she yelled "WE NEED THEM FOR OXYGEN," Then went back to sleep.
We need to get on her level.
You went after him with a sword while screaming “FAJITAS!”. And Todd was dressed as a Goth for some reason
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