a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
Im rethinking drunk tuesdays. Also rethinking ovaries.
You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
I have the slightest memory of swinging a bag full of condoms over my head...
i need to stop meeting underage girls and letting them into the bar. i mean yea its a surefire way to get laid without having to tell them I'm 26 but i feel like as a bouncer I'm focusing on all the wrong things
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
I just wanna be euthanized
Thas it
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Randomize