just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
