I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
I'm wearing the bright blue sombrero all through the airport as a sign of triumph that I survived spring break. I'm getting compliments
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
It was kind of like a train wreck, except alcohol would have improved the situation greatly.
I'm sweating so much right now i look like Whitney Houston
do you still have a key to my apartment? Without going into too much detail locked myself out naked on the patio, currently using a deck cushion to cover myself so kids walking home from school dont see me
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
Just rode a bull topless for a free bar tap for a month
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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