I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
Never again let me pretend to be australian for free booze.
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
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