can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
Just come over and take your pants off. 35 mins tops. You'll be home before midnight cinderella
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Breaking into his house to steal the sheets I'd drunk pissed on before he got home was not how I wanted to be spending spring break
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
I have a mild substance abuse problem, but I'm still a functioning member of society. America.
Randomize
