There's a woman at Starbucks that keeps pushing her stroller into me.
Punch her baby.
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
He has crabs, not bed bugs. I recommend incoporating a clinic on this mornings walk of shame route.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
Trump won PA by a fucking landslide. If only Cruz hadn't eaten that booger.
I found condoms in the back yard from you and your boyfriend. My house isnt a motel
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
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