Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
my soul wont recognize me after tonight
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
I haven't even booked my flights yet and I have my drug supply sorted
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
You are lucky that I'm drunk. Otherwise I would bone you into another universe
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
Drake has all the answers
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
If there's someone that knows accidental pantlessness, it's Mike.
Randomize
