So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
oh well at that point I was already depressed with life because I had watched the bratz movie.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
After you took the handle off the bathroom door I had to coach the Scottish guy sitting on the toilet, throwing up in his own lap, how to put his pants back on. Yes, I think he won the drinking game.
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
I woke up to a gnawing sound in the middle of the night and asked him what it was. He told me it was the family of squirrels that lives in the wall and to go back to sleep.
Oh man I'm using the bubble wrap that wraped my new vibrator to wrap my dads fathers day gift
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
you ever just feel like an organ is failing?
Dude I asked him to get me beef jerky at 4 am and he actually walked to CVS to get it. CVS closes at 12 but it was the perfect opp to dip out
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
I forgot wine drunk hurts
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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