did you wind up at some random place? and do you remember face planting into the fireplace?
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
i may have reached my "but im high so it's cool" quota for the month.
I still don't understand how I went from crying to blowing you in like two minutes.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
I mean obviously I like your dick... Jury is still out on you but your dick is good
WHY DID YOU DRUNK DIAL MY MOM?!
Because mine was sitting on the bar stool next to me...
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
I yelled at your uterus for you.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
