Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
If you dont, I will tell Dad you are gay.
Fine, and I will tell him you fucked his business partner
Previous statement retracted.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Do they take checks?
Did you really just ask me if you could write a check for a DRUG DEAL?
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
Randomize
