I was amazed that you fell flat on your ass and still managed not to spill them drinks in your hands. Your getting good at this.
I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
Tell me why Im cashing out of Walmart with Smirnoff and catfood
she moved to the other side of town, do you realize how far i gotta walk to get a blow job???
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh no it's bring yor chld to work day...I'm too drunk for this
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
Pandora was on point with the sex music tonight
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
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