She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
Don't let me forget to bring the toilet inside tonight.
His apology was sex and a subway sandwich. Strangely, I'm okay with that.
Dude, you need to understand there is a fine line between "guilty pleasure" and in the closet gay
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
I'm getting flash backs of last night. They're coming in song form.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
according to last night, I underestimated the size of my mouth and the possibilities of what can fit into it.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
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