What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
About to fuck some random fraternity guy I met at a party. I guess this would be the right time to say I don't want to be with you anymore.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
Omg just remembered. I tried to kidnap a dog.
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
At what point would you like us to save you from yourself?
Tried to drunkenly hop a fence with my cast on to get away from the cops but ended up falling over a bench.. how do I explain those bruises to my parents?
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
Randomize
