Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
