Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
I understand Curling. That high.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
somebody put my brain in a crown royal bag and beat the shit out of it
He needs a high five right to the fucking mouth. With a chair. Or an atomic bomb.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
He's probably the biggest I've seen outside of the porn I vehemently deny watching and he asks if I think he's too small
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Imma make him fuck me with my jersey on tonight while I chant Go Jets Go. Gotta love playoff hockey szn.
Interlocking vagina powers go!!'
Oh god, your drunk again aren't you?
Randomize
