I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
Don't say that out loud. People might think I really like to pee on you.
Of course you don't like it. I am the one who likes it.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
Let me start this apology by saying you were the finest piece of ass I ever had.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
I'm not gonna lie. The only reason I haven't drank a whole bottle of crown tonight is because we only had 3/4 of a bottle left.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
And I'm sorry for punching you in the face when I drunkenly threw my sandwich
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
eating pizza to get the taste of dick out my mouth wby
Randomize
