these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
Ya, found out why there were rat traps in my bed. Guess I pissed in Sams room so he went to the store and got them and put them on my bed and put tabasco in his humidifier and put it in my room
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
Halfway through he got an idea for a short story so he wrote it in magic marker on my boobs. Yeah, he's a keeper.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my longitudinal study of the long term effects of sloth and alchol-intake is nearly complete.
so you are graduating this semester.
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
He's my BOYFRIEND but he won't sext me. I'll be like, "tell me how you want to fuck me", and he's like, "I love how we can talk about our feelings". FUCK
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
I am texting my fuck buddy about fucking tonight, while facebook chatting with his wife about food.
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
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