By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
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he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
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