She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Not only did I get beyond cray cray this weekend. My body has nursed itself to plentiful and impeccable health. Fuck you world, I am back.
Now some guy that's in my phone as " Alex lip ring hot" is texting me and I don't where life is taking me
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
Randomize
