my night went downhill once I lost my bikershorts. EAWSSSSYY ACCESS
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
I just woke up on my kitchen floor using a yellow pages as a pillow and surrounded by plants that used to be in the garden around my apt building, can't wait to see the security tapes for my eviction
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
Yes, that was me on the jumbo tron. No, i don't know why i was hiding.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
"Grocery shopping" is really just a euphemism for spending $20 on enough frozen food to last 2 weeks and spending the rest of your viable paycheck on alcohol.
You stopped loving me for a minute.
You sent me "Is nap," I don't think that really counts as a conversation starter.
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
The Dick I got last night was so phenomenal that I had to take a fucking personal day today.
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
Hammered...8am...why is there chickens in the living room?
Randomize
