I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
Just had a flashback to Friday. Definitely had my hands in someone's bra. Definitely wasn't mine.
Tequila pump. I'm ecstatic your engineering degree has real world application.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
Hold on I'll be right there, I can't find my arm.
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
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