i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
I'm dressed like a deranged cupcake. Let's get fucked up.
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
God it's like my stomach is full of drunk bees
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
You don't know being judged until its 7:30 in the morning and you're on 2 hours of sleep halfway between drunk and hungover wearing pajama pants at an international airport while saying how proud you are that you found the airport's bar immediately and how disappointed you are that it's closed
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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