Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
Tostitos Scoops as shot glasses. Eat for chaser.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
Theres dried jager, barbecue sauce and frie remnants all over my front seat.
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
He waited exactly 18 minutes to booty call me after his break up.
Ripped as fuck driving to get a portrait of my cat tattooed on my arm
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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