NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
After he was done he gave me a case of landshark and tickets to tomorrows yankee game. This is the best nonrelationship ever
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
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