This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
IT'S FRIDAY. So quit being a pussy, get out of bed, and come help me drink these 40s. That's not a request.
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
My time here is complete. I think I have now thrown up in every major degree programs building
Just remember that I named his dick Robo-cock before he got into the sheriff's department.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
WHO THE FUCK PEED IN MY BONG
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
Mom just walked in with a bag of weed and funyuns. I'll talk to you later.
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
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