i just took a sip of diet coke and i said " as soon as it hits my lips i wanna smoke a cig." then i thought of your dick.
I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
We gotta locate my vibrators and get them stashed away STAT
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
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