remember that night jesus turned water into wine? DRUNKER.
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
New thing to add to the list of never wanted to talk about with my grandma: sweating in ur crouch and vag area
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
