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• (201): View more from New Jersey

  Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.

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• (603): View more from New Hampshire

  So we made editble underwear with fruit roll ups and fruit by the foot

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• (601): View more from Mississippi

  they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.

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• (248): View more from Michigan

  i had to do the walk of shame dressed as a leprechaun. I have never been more proud of my irish roots.

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  Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July

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• (520): View more from Arizona

  New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.

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• (248): View more from Michigan

  i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.

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• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.

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• (810): View more from Michigan

  Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.

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• (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  he is like the poster child for std's. god i hope he meets a girl with teeth in her vag. that would serve him right

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  19 Of The Creepiest (Most Inexplicable) Things People Experienced

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• (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  If thou arrisest to consciousness before I, rise me to an office of alertness for occupations such as brunch. Warm Regards, your roommate.

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• (519): View more from Ontario

  University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."

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• (914): View more from New York

  So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.

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• (512): View more from Texas

  Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"

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• (281): View more from Texas

  Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.

  (713): View more from Texas

  I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.

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• (585): View more from New York

  I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky

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