Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
He just asked if I would make his black snake moan. Dating basketball players is not worth the glory
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
Randomize
