after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
I'm the saddest girl in a tutu right now.
there is vodka in my soul right now. The vapor is coming out my nose.
I just discovered I can sober up while teaching class
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
When do you sleep by the way. I was surprised when I went to work at 1 am,left at 7 am and had a text from you somewhere in between
I just vodka nap now...
I was a bouncer for about 90 seconds until the real bouncers figured out that I was doing their job
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
The closest thing I've had to an orgasm lately is sneezing nonstop from fucking allergies.
Did I penguin dive down a hill last night?
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
I found my parents stash of sex toys. You know my green one? My mom has it...in purple. I HAVE THE SAME VIBRATOR AS MY MOTHER
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
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