How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
My hand turned me down
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
I was drunk for 3 days straight...well wasted for 3 days with periods of "just drunk" inbetween
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
Dude. Where are you? There's a hot chick drunkenly dancing on the bar and aggressively taking shots to Pink songs. She looks like she needs a rebound. Get. Here. Now.
FUCK NYC TRAFFIC.
I’m a coke loving, addy selling, pot smoking CRIMINOLOGY major. If there isn't irony in that I give up.
My boss want to throw me an everclear birthday.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
My drug dealer was just on ESPN..
I totally fucked your pastor last night.
You're his wife.
Still a dirty get down.
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