Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
hey, what are you doing tonight?
sleeping, g'night!
but i wanted to see you :(
sleeping! g'night!(801): i miss you!
stop - you have a right hand - use it!
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
Just kissed her with a dip in my mouth... She was either too drunk to notice or too cool to care
Thank God they found balloon boy, I was afraid that Michael Jackson was ordering take out from heaven.
You ruined his night from a different state? Impressive.
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Wow. I hope you were either doing that in your sleep or blacked out. You threw up then covered yourself in duct tape... i wish i got that on camera
Randomize
