The shirt is mine, the pants are mine, the bra not so much
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Brought out my three foot martini glass last night, that explains why I haven't left my bed all day long.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
This show inspires me to have sex in space
I fell asleep on the table at Denny's. Told the waitress to wake me up when my burger was there.
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
Apparently she "missed me" and the only logical solution was to fuck my brother.
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
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