she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and i do it all in one night. I'm like santa but a whore.
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
DUDE I FINGERED JOE'S MOM, PLS DONT TELL HIM, MORE LATER
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
Randomize