Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
it's my fault, I passed out instead of getting up to pee.
Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wonder what chicks would think if they learned that when we add them on fb we email their bikini pics to each other.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
I need something that says "I'm gay sometimes but I feel scorned by my straight, non-committal lover, so I'm here to get drunk and make out, and possibly end up in a bathroom with someone who's name I won't remember tomorrow"
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
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